My dad keeps saying I need to go back on my medication. It’s his only response every time I say something he doesn’t like or agree with. Its very insulting. I mean, its true that when I’m not on my medication, all my emotions are out of control and all of my responses are way stronger than they’re meant to be…but that doesn’t mean that my emotions are unfounded or that there isn’t a legitimate cause behind my responses.
Ugh. I thought it would be good for me to move back in with my dad for awhile. Thought “it’ll be great, I’ll save up some money and get back to my roots and just hit the reset button on all this shit that’s been making me miserable the last few months.” What a laugh. I feel like I’m 15 again. That was the worst time in my life…I was SOOO happy when I finally got away from it. Now I’m trapped here all over again and I’m going absolutely mental. Every second of every day I’m screaming inside. I feel so pitiful and I miss SAN ANTONIO of all fucking places. I was sad and directionless there. But I was happy. And strong. I miss it. I miss feeling like I belong.